Volume: 2

Amy

The sharp decline of The Dump.

One of the benefits I received when I became an employee was life insurance. The company paid for the policy and it accrued value over time. It turns out that one of Amy's ideas was to borrow against all the employees' life insurance policies. Now, to save costs, they're discontinuing the benefit altogether. Employees can continue the policy but have to assume the loan and its associated interest payments. Some benefit.

1987 - "The worst thing that could happen is that this company goes under." - Ian Young

1994 - "The worst thing that could happen is that it doesn't." - Ian Young

Amy spent $900 on fake plants to put in the offices of those suffering twenty percent pay cuts.

***

This building has a UNIX based system that manages the security system and fountains, of all things. I, the only computer dweeb here, can't access that machine because Andrew's secretary runs it. But she doesn't know anything about it other than how to schedule locking and unlocking the doors and changing fountain hours. Last month, I suggested to Andrew that the system would fail if someone didn't evaluate its resources. This morning, Andrew roared into my office, pissed. The machine failed Saturday and the building remained unlocked the entire weekend. The fountain motors burned out because there's no longer a water supply hooked up to them.